Good things come in twos
Two essays on the class divide in civic life, two pieces on community for parents, two new podcasts, and two ways policy can promote neighborhood connection
A warm welcome to the hundreds of new subscribers who joined us since last week! We’re excited to have you as a part of our communal tissue box (can we make that a thing?). Don’t hesitate to reach out to us (theconnectivetissue@gmail.com) to introduce yourself, ask questions about what we’re up to, and find time to connect.
This week, as we do each month, we’re sharing a new curated list spotlighting some of our favorite reads, listens, research, and examples of community-building work. Our round-up for this week comes in several sets of twos:
Two essays responding to the Disconnected report on the class divides in civic life that Sam co-authored last month.
Two pieces responding to the Surgeon General’s recent advisory on parental well-being.
Two recent listens from friends of Connective Tissue: the new Lost Prophets Podcast and a Wisdom of Crowds interview with Charles Taylor.
Two initiatives working to promote cooperation and connectedness within neighborhoods: LCW’s NeighborCircles and Boston’s Block Party Grants.
Plus, we feature an invite to an upcoming Connective Tissue Policy Framework launch event with the Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies on how housing and neighborhood policies can promote connection within communities.
There’s something for everyone in this week’s newsletter — some may even say it’s twice as nice — so dive in and choose your own adventure.
Deuces,
Sam + Eric
The Reads
The Atlantic and The New York Times - “The Friendship Paradox” and “The Loneliness Epidemic Has a Cure” by Olga Khazan and David French (Sept. 2024)
“The thought that so many millions of our fellow citizens feel as if they don’t belong, as if they can’t call anyone for help or simply lack the pure joy of fellowship with close friends should grieve us all. It should change the way we behave. It should make us be more intentional about reaching out to people. And it should call us to action in our own neighborhoods and communities.”
The Disconnected report that Sam co-authored last month with the Survey Center on American Life recently received two pieces of high-profile coverage, so we’re giving you a two-for-one.
highlights the the growing class divide in who has access to third places. She describes how, “People with money and regular work hours can see friends at Orangetheory or their local bar … whereas those who work long days, multiple jobs, or erratic schedules might not be able to.” And she describes how even free public places, like libraries and parks, are accessed at much higher rates among Americans with degrees. Making and deepening friendships has become harder, but especially for those who didn’t go to college.And, writing for The New York Times, David French gets at a major "so what" of the report in this passage: "The disappearance of friendship has profound consequences … there is a class divide in the percentage of Americans who can rely on someone to give them a ride to the doctor, lend them a small amount of money in an emergency or offer a place to stay. Another way of putting this is that the Americans who are most vulnerable to losing the informal social safety net of friends and relatives may be the people who need it the most."
→ Read the Atlantic piece here and the Times piece here.
The New York Times - “Today’s Parents: ‘Exhausted, Burned Out and Perpetually Behind’” and “Parents Should Ignore Their Children More Often” by Claire Cain Miller and Darby Saxbe (Sept. 2024)
“In such places [Germany, Spain, Denmark] you can relax and catch up with friends while children romp around — a reminder of how much easier parenting gets when we enjoy the social trust born from shared investment in care.”
The parenting beat recently went into overdrive, after the Surgeon General’s Opinion piece on how “loneliness” afflicts parents and caregivers nationwide. Response pieces have been rampant, and these two were particularly pointed.
Miller dives into the chronology of how the American style of “intensive parenting” came about, tracing academic (early childhood development) and economic (increased competition for jobs) shifts that led to present-day parenting styles. She also hints at deeper values-centric issues: though people often say that “it takes a village” to raise a child, American individualist values have left parents feeling more alone in child-rearing than ever, particularly given the decline of informal community networks. She concludes with policy approaches that might be helpful to parents, but questions whether the country actually needs cultural change more than policy change.
Saxbe’s headline is as hot-take-y as it gets: ignore your kids, it’ll help! The piece dives into intensive parenting again, pointing out how burdensome it is on adults, and how it is really a uniquely American norm that doesn’t prevail in, say, Europe. And while Ms. Miller highlights the common policy calls (e.g., paid family leave), this piece points out that we need literally structural change — a far more child-friendly built environment — to relieve kids and grown-ups alike.
→ Read Miller’s piece here and Saxbe’s piece here.
The Listens
- “#1: Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel” and “#2: Jane Jacobs” with Pete Davis & Elias Crim
and , two friends of the newsletter, are out with an excellent new podcast about “the lost prophets of solidarity — and the voices we need to hear again.” The podcast aims to lift up several mid-century thinkers and doers from “a time when spiritual politics was more than a live option.” The first episode is on the prophetic rabbi, Abraham Joshua Heschel, and the second is on the urban visionary and prophet, Jane Jacobs. Future episodes will cover the likes of Ivan Illich, Hannah Arendt, E.F. Schumacher, Simone Weil, Ella Baker, and more. We encourage you to give the first two podcasts a listen and consider subscribing. → Listen to the Heschel episode here and the Jacobs episode here.
- “Charles Taylor on the Need for Cosmic Connection” with Santiago Ramos and Samuel Kimbriel
Another friend of Connective Tissue,
, just interviewed philosopher and living legend, Charles Taylor. The interview explores the topic of Cosmic Connections, Taylor’s new book about poetry as a response to disenchantment and experiencing nature as an antidote to disconnection. It’s a conversation that takes the topics we explore in this newsletter to their deeper, metaphysical roots.
The Work
NeighborCircles, Block Parties, and connection within neighborhoods
“American neighborhoods can be places for participation not withdrawal, connection not isolation, bridging not sorting.” - Connective Tissue Policy Framework
When people ask me (Sam) about the highest potential policy opportunities from our recently released policy framework, I often point to the role of housing and neighborhoods. America’s housing affordability crisis has spurred serious, bipartisan action to promote mixed-income neighborhoods, from zoning reforms to promote “middle housing” to emergent social housing efforts.
But more mixed-income neighborhoods alone will not create more connection, either overall and across lines of difference (e.g., class, age, race). Our neighborhoods need to be brought to life through programs, activities, and shared projects. Next week, we’re hosting a framework launch event with the Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies on this very topic — “Can Housing Policy Create Connections and Build Community?” — and we’re excited to highlight two promising initiatives during the panel:
Lawrence Community Works’ NeighborCircles are led by a resident “host” and a trained facilitator, who gather 8 to 10 families to come together a total of three times over the course of a month for dinner and conversation. Through this process, “[neighbors] get to know each other, talk about the neighborhood or the city, and decide as a group if there is something that they can do together to help build community in Lawrence, MA.”
Boston’s Block Party Grants Initiative provides up to $750 in funding for Boston residents to plan and host block parties to connect and celebrate with their neighbors. As one Boston block party host described his experience, “These events can bridge the gap between older residents, longtime residents and families and newcomers … dancing in the streets together, playing games, street chalk art and sharing food really brings us together.”
If you’re free at 4PM ET on Tuesday, September 24th, we encourage you to join us for the conversations. It’ll feature a mix of big ideas and practical actions for policymakers, practitioners, and neighbors to activate their neighborhoods as platforms for connection.